Tuesday, November 30, 2004
the drifter
my prodigal agent malcolm finally gave me the piece of news i've been wanting to hear since last november. http://belynda.blogspot.com/2004/07/happiness-is.htmlhe's finally asking me for police clearance, which is sure sign that the PR approval's almost there. why prodigal? he's always giving me philosophical sun tsu replies like "patience is the mother of all virtues". egads. and yes, i'm the quitter. all other things equal, my only regrets are my family, close friends and a special someone. but hell, melbourne's but a pea throw away.
digressed. yes, this news came on my birthday (wow) and for once i wasn't quite sure how to feel. given this news six months ago i've jumped for joy and called for a slosh party with my mates. instead, i've only mentioned this to the select. my folks, celine and mak. what's mak gonna say? what's he gonna do? and what're we gonna do next? i'm not too sure as yet what's in store for us. i've three years to decide the day it finally gets officially approved. till then...
and guess what? i will be spending a white xmas with my special someone this year after all. Not in NY but russia and finland. hey, there's always a space for NY city later...
bee wrote this at 9:16 AM
Monday, November 29, 2004
cult toys
blythe
was NEVER into bears, kitty dolls or plush cutesy what-have-yous but i do have a list of toys i'd so love to have if i had more money:
- strawberry shortcake (mom threw away my entire porcelain collection plus the smurfs which i could've sold for a hefty price. dammit)
- kubrick toy figures
- blythe (love her so much but can't bear to pay the price)
- vintage barbies 1959 (i've been saving to get this for the past three years but always ended up with shoes instead)
- cabbage patch kids (i dun care what you say bout them i like them, cute what!)
- pound puppies
was scouting for plush toy premiums at far east square furry faces and discovered this collection of beautiful strawberry shortcake watches. almost bought it but it was pricey at 45 bucks. maybe later...
bee wrote this at 6:17 PM
mid-day sidetrack
compliments of trish, enjoy!The Genius of Peter Kay
1. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.
2. I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
3. Sex is like a game of bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
4. I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough.' this is nasty but i like the twisted humor.
5. You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither. me neither
Peter Kay's questions...
1. Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed? cos their job is to look into your privates and not the exterior.
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed? rats.
3. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?
4. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
5. Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?
6. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
7. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out of the window?
Peter Kay's Universal Truths
1. Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones. hey! that's true!
2. Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl. cos its silly. it's like making expresso in a regular cup.
3. You never know where to look when eating a banana. that's me!
4. You can't respect a man who carries a dog. says who? i think they look sweet, not sissy sweet of cos.
5. There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your hand or head stuck in something. tell me bout it. i'm the first to freak out when rings get stuck on my fingers.
6. People who don't drive slam car doors too hard.
oh btw, visited steven lim's updated site http://www.stevenlim.net , this dude rocks. he's better than fabio and i'm feeling mighty inspired to do a campaign for him. what think you tony? pro bono?
*ahahhahahahhahaha*
bee wrote this at 5:17 PM
oh..oh..the smell
having a terrible and nauseous headache from the stuffy old cab ten minutes ago. it smelled like sour sheets (ala backpackers mattresses) and month long BOs and bryl cream. egads! oh gosh, i wanna throw up now.bee wrote this at 1:53 PM
bling bling- real or not first?
have you ever had any woman flash her big rock at you, and i mean literally IN-YOUR-FACE? i had that honor at far east square spinelli's this morning. was doing my usual morning perusal of seductive muffins and cookies when this lady conveniently shot her left hand out and "posed" it on the food display, obviously disregarding my presence. then again, i reckon she did that on purpose cos i caught her looking at me from the corner of my eye. WELL. congratulations miss so-and-so, singapore has one less available ah lian i suppose and that you're obviously brimming with exuberance over your new found status but you don't have to be so bloody blatant and ostentatious sticking your gaudy skinny fingers over the muffin tray right? get your fingers outta my muffins now!on another note, isn't it ironic how the locals are so concerned about flaunting logos rather than buying authenticity? saw three chinese women selling LV bags along the underpass of orchard wisma and you wouldn't believe the amount of middle class women they attracted. which is warped cos the intention of carrying logos (to this bunch of women) lies in the hope of increasing their social status. and buying replicas would only serve to kick you one step down that social ladder cos HULLO, people do recognise quality and details in genuine products (especially sales people in boutiques, they do have a keen eye for such items).
checklist:
1) the watch. they usually have good timepieces.
2) overall appearance. mani and pedicured feet, styled hair.
3) shoes. you can tell from details (cut, form, materials) how expensive they are. do your research. go to any regular department store and move on ahead to on peddar at takashimaya. huge difference baby.
4) mannerisms and speech. eg: "eh, harlow? no lar, i at on peddah now, taka lar, ta-ka-shi-may-yah, where you, what time you pick me up?" tsktsk. you may be carrying a two grand chanel bag and still look the lowest of low on the social scale.
there's absolutely nothing wrong wearing regular stuff cos they are indeed affordable and comfortable, which is more important. but it's also terribly nauseating watching bogus bling blings flashing by. why oh why oh why?
bee wrote this at 9:12 AM
Sunday, November 28, 2004
i-d
i-d
the benefits of dating an architect (trained in interiors too)? voila, a solution to ernest's moisture infested studio flooring by laying unfinished tiles and pebbles for a steal of only hundred and fifty dollars in half a day's work! it's just like participating in the aussie series of "changing rooms". what a saturday! beats tying red ribbons man.
the ribbon factory
and i'm not talking bout action-for-aids here. at nine pm, the bunch of eleven seated here were frantically trying to complete slotting eight hundred ribbons onto the order of worship for pam and kinyew's wedding next saturday. it's totally nerve wrecking trying to slot these ribbons into the tiny hole AND doing extra knots to ensure the ribbon's secured AND keeping count of the completed ones. er....who's counting when there's already eight hundred to be completed anyway? sniff, we all deserve a good neck rub.
i reckon i wouldn't do anything tediously cute in the future, lest you guys fret bout severe labour shortage and myopia. then again, never say never huh?
bee wrote this at 10:12 PM
the prodigal pseudo master
wowee
captured dad in one of his rare "wide" smile moments. awesome. he's quite adorable if you don't talk to him for more than twenty minutes(max) on sensitively eruptive issues like women and cab drivers, politics (world and Sim family) and traditions. he's never failed to piss me off during these sessions with his conversative methodology and actions. especially not when he digs pop trash like britney spear's love life? easy does it papa sim. you've created a monstrous little girl here.
bee wrote this at 9:59 PM
TGIF
me and jules
finally caught up with julie over lunch on friday at o'briens. strange that we found each other more interesting now that we're no longer working together. see? the world operates in strange ways at times. see jule's version of the pic http://juleschiang.blogspot.com/2004/11/old-mates-meeting-up.html
we really have to do martinis at coolies before xmas, not forgetting other babe rita who so reminded me of pocahontas (perfect!) and diva ren of cos : )
bee wrote this at 9:58 PM
Friday, November 26, 2004
the political compass
go to http://www.politicalcompass.org/interesting stuff. likewise Ghandi, i'm a liberal leftist. cos we both believe in the "supreme value of each individual". aahhh. honestly, i can't read the medians properly so if you're trying to tell me something next time, pls do so in text and not graphs. failed to mention i fucking hated statistics in school. but in any case, here're my results. economic left/right: -4.12social libertarian/authoritarian: -2.92 (whatever that means)
bee wrote this at 2:40 PM
the dreaded application form
have never given the application form much thought cos it was hardly needed in our line of work really. all we need (advertising) is a glib tongue, quick comebacks, shitloads of personality, good or basic knowledge of campaign briefs and rules 101 (which you'll be equipped with handy adman books) and of cos, look damn fucking good at your interview. (btw, today's International Very Good Looking Damn Smart Woman's Day, see below). it always helps cos you never know what's gonna be the straw between you and girl A (all other qualities and brain equivalent).but in view of a future outta advertising (u never know), i'm gonna attempt filling out a typical form compliments of fellow writer kevin tricorn ng *who's also well versed in kinky stuff ala "guts" review*.
NAME: belynda sim
SEX: would there be a male calling himself belynda? i'll like to meet shim.
DESIRED POSITION: would you give me something which was not advertised? if so, why didn't you put it down huh? why cos its "reserved" for "close friends" isn't it? its NEPOTISM and it's fucking illegal (in my ideal world).
DESIRED SALARY: $120,000 grand a year plus bonus and profit sharing sounds awesome for now. *then again, i reckon only the oil and financial industries could afford this option, so no go huh*
EDUCATION: a bachelor likewise the entire world. *so what makes local undergrads so "proud" and snooty when the entire fucking spore's filled with bachelor's and above?* why in the world do they think they're the best???
LAST POSITION HELD: a slight step higher than where i am now. so what the heck am i doing?
SALARY: always not enuff one lar *rolls eyes*
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: handling short (in height) difficult-to-please male bosses and clients and getting away in one piece. i swear short men are indeed at times smarter and more cunning, dunno why... to make up for the lack in physical height i guess. and making dragon lady bosses happy with your delivery. excellent!
REASON FOR LEAVING: to be politically correct, i WANT to experience a new challenge. to be non PC, yeah it sucked everywhere from the cleaners to the hotshots.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: preferably 9-4pm (hate the human jams)
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: and why would i be doin that may i ask?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: no, but i'll really like one. so thank you in advance. it's a red beetle cabriolet. my first "cute" car.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: i don't know yet. it's not a lack of ambition. it's just the bohemian in me retaliating against the normalcy of a typical singaporean's personal "roadmap" [you must this , you must that or you'll not have enuff money to buy a darn expensive HDB or get married or raise kids or put them through tuition or.....wait, can i revise my desired salary now to $500k per annum as it takes...half a mil to raise each kid here.]
till then, i celebrate
Very Good Looking Damn Smart Woman! Good motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming WOO HOO what a ride! Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away."
*toast to all my babes out there, we rock (for now)*
bee wrote this at 11:02 AM
if only...
1. the rain could be snowfall instead2. my desk space could turn into my cosy flat 70, room 1 desk
3. all locals would be as nice as the lady who offered me a "ride" under her brollie @ far east square twenty min ago
4. agencies offered coffee allowance to spinellis like morgan stanley and citibank
5. the cabs would appear when i'm in dire need of one
6. i believed in cheaper footwear that wouldn't bleed my heart when sinking them into horrendous water puddles [sorry but quality of shoes are really important so they're either birkies or calf leather]
7. every month feels like december
utopia ...what would you do if you really did live in one? wouldn't it make you devoid of any emotions cos you don't feel the need to want anymore? what's it like living in a place like that then?
bee wrote this at 8:54 AM
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
golden fingers- part 2
AGAIN!
once again, i spotted stuffed tissue in the taxi AGAIN. but this time i was careful and missed dipping my fingers into the gunk. good on me yeah!
bee wrote this at 8:36 PM
bee illustrated
iconic bee
my bud tony sent me this months ago cos he thought it was an excellent graphic depiction of moi. i like!
ps: those on MSN would know how much i liked it
bee wrote this at 10:06 AM
"revocation of your independence"
compliments of cheelip, enjoy! here're some snippets taken off the article (and you're right, i do like the brit vs american wit hehe)1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour', skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than laziness on your part. You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z'(pronounced 'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix "ise". Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary then you won't have to use bad language as often.
2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell -checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize".
9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour. [sick man...sick]
10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't even French; they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called "crisps". Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat.
12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer", and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as "Lager". The substances formerly known as "American Beer" will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Piss", with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as "Weak Near-Frozen Gnat's Piss". This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.
16. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776.)
haha. somehow i reckon a very very unhappy american penned this.
bee wrote this at 9:45 AM
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
roots
growing up in a hokkien household yet largely influenced by the maternal cantonese, i constantly found myself struggling between the dialects during my younger days. contrary to what some popular culture critics might say, tv's an extremely powerful medium for all ages. i mastered cantonese within a span of six months thru cheesy cantonese serials and films. hokkien on the other hand didn't pick up a similar momentum. instead, its gruff nature regressed its way into the back of my brain and surreptitiously surfaced in bouts of anger when "fuck" ain't as satisfying as "chicken bye" or "nah hia". both of which are hardly utilised due to the vulgarity and blue collarness of the lingo. no offence but i'm not exactly proud of it as witnessed in many public occasions and younger lian days.certain things i picked up from my cantonese roots:
we talk loud. but since i'm only half cantonese, my volume's more controlled. pseudo master and me dread getting caught between popo and mom during dinner. they tend to ignore you and shout across the table anyway. and guess what? the dining table ain't that big after all. ouch. and we're great cooks, soups and desserts in particular. again, since i'm only half cantonese, my cooking skills are limited to a half as well.
certain things from my hokkien roots:
we're pretty *that deserved a wah lau eh but it's true* hokkien girls are known to be pretty and teochew girls for their gentleness-ala yew siuness.
btw, i've always wondered and cursed the moron who coined the goosebump-raising local phase "steady pom pi pi". can you please tell me what the fuck is that?
bee wrote this at 9:12 PM
ooh.
what makes an inspiring office environment?- no rules as long as you deliver
- long well deserved christmas breaks
- good money
- fun people
- good looking people
- kick ass music
- big desk space
- after hours booze (in the office)
- after hours smoking (anywhere in the office as long as you carry the ashtray around)
- healthy bitch bonding
bee wrote this at 2:03 PM
rumble in the stomach
ever walked around a food court from stall to stall suffering from gastric hunger pangs yet not knowing and not deciding what you're gonna have till a tight knot forms and sends a signal to your brain to fuck it and just buy whatever it is in front of you cos u just don't wanna browse anymore amidst blind morons in sharp heels and "char kuay teow eau de mist"?that's where one ends up with crappy food. food that you don't fancy. food that ain't tasty (explains why there's no queue). food that's not worth its money. and here i have, another dissatisfying luncheon with oily parfum in my hair.
dammit.
bee wrote this at 1:44 PM
the one that melted my heart again
sweetie dropped by the office yesterday lunch and presented the birthday surprise. how he brings tears to my eyes. awww. you you...you...*sigh*
bee wrote this at 9:27 AM
a picturesque weekend
celine's exhibit
visited celine at the gallery on fri nite 20 nov. herein her third installation titled "flick".
celine
the artist @ marmalade for brunch on nov 21 sunday
sonja
camera shy again.
trish
the one who dissed vintage (ah-mah) and is now seen in bohemian beads *snigger*
indulgence @ marmalade
lovely white with desserts. yummy.
pseudo master
the subdued protagonist at mezzanine.
mom
mom, desperately on "diet" regime but've never actually implemented it.
mak
dearie at mezzanine
scrumptious din @ mezzanine
yakitori rocks.
bee wrote this at 9:09 AM
cake-a-thon
marmalade pantry on 20 nov
despite wallowing a plate of eggs and what-have-yous, we've decided to do the female suicide by ordering apple rhubarb with vanilla icecream, chocolate muffins and the infamous devil's food. we have sinned indeed.
choc truffle @ mezzanine hyatt on sunday 21 nov
mak couldn't resist the temptation. gave in to a slice of truffle after din.
choc fudge compliments of mak's mommy on monday 22 nov
sweetie and auntie surprised me with fudge *drool*.
in case you're wondering, it's the chocolate slut here. an indeed wondrous yet sinful weekend for the 22 nov birthday gurl.
ouch, my waistline's pinching now.
bee wrote this at 9:04 AM
Friday, November 19, 2004
corporate psychopaths
signs of a probable CP- manipulative
(if the concept doesn't sell at first try, try, try again till u get some sense knocked into some harebrained clients)
- lack specific goals
(honestly, how many of us have goals, specific some more?)
- superficial relations with people
(erm. u dun say.)
- impulsive
(to client: WHAT do you mean this creative "cannot make it"? pls be SPECIFIC)
- irresponsible
- crave power and prestige
- lack empathy
(who shows us (suits) that when the campaign doesn't deliver? tell me tell me?)
- lack remorse
(lying thru ur teeth to sell inappropriate media space)
- lie easily
(we stayed up all night brainstorming and here's our best 3 big ideas!)
- have predatory instincts
(hullo but i think we do need this to survive)
- cool under pressure
(hey! this is highly respected behaviour for suits)
- seek excitement and thrills
(still allowing changes on ads when its supposed to be in FA, sent for seps and materials due tomorrow)
- take credit for the work of others
- fly into rages
(when prick creatives accuse you of not knowing how to sell creative. ah, excuse me hor but u think i like to keep writing progressives and goin back to present NEW concepts to client again and again issit?)
goodness.
doesn't it mean all of us (esp advertising) qualify for the role of the barmy bustard?
bee wrote this at 1:30 PM
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
itadakimasu
wowee
my fav sashimi mix. kajiki, salmon and tai. heavenly! thank heavens pseudo master lurvs japanese food.
bee wrote this at 10:36 PM
it reminded me of what?
music. that certain song that brings me back to driving along freeway south- bachelor girl's buses and trains
- regurgitator's polyester girl (i love that track!)
- macy gray's i try
- my old 98' trance and euphoria collections
- ministry of sound
- chemistry bros
- the matrix soundtrack
food. that certain food which reminded me so much of a particular someone
- sago guka melaka and peas (celine)
- dim sum (tam and "the lump", ivan with uncle kenny)
- microwavable food (kae and her carbo regime)
- peanut butter choc fudge (ryan, my amercian flatmate who looks like some actor but reaches my ears. it was heaven having him in the flat cos there's always dessert when we get back)
- steak (bryan)
- coffee and yogurt (michelle ala "bollywood"'s lunch)
- pub food (dora)
- pasta (mak. i swear that's all he survives on)
- alcohol (dora, kc, ivan, trish and dean. yes. u alcoholics)
- anywhere in holland v (ivan)
- fruits (pseudo master)
and brocolli (that's me! i was the undefeated broc queen)
i'm bored as u can see. wish i can find some unsuspecting asinine person to pick on now, at least i'll be entertained! *bitch bitch bitch* now santa won't wanna see me cos i ain't a good gurl. darn it.
bee wrote this at 8:51 AM
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
old things, new things so many things
how often have we not struggled with emotional turmoil? these painful moments are instituted the very moment we begin feeling a little too much for a certain thing. it may be a human form, it may be a jack russell or it may be the old tattered quilt cover we've drooled in since we were two. why do we over-romanticize? why do we still find ourselves dealing with these agonizing situations where we could've chosen to avoid them by simply limiting our "emotions". would being more unsympathetic, unfeeling, insensitive, make our world a happier place? rats. how could i be a simpleton and believe subscribing to a callous mind would make me a happier person? like how curiosity killed the cat, schmaltziness killed the wo-man.bee wrote this at 5:38 PM
Monday, November 15, 2004
the darker side of human forms
saw. a very much disturbing film but well executed i must say. film was like an in-between of seven , the bone collector and the german film the black box.vampire crimes. racist lynching. hannibal lectors. rapists. psychopaths.
what do they have in common?
what do they desire out of their monstrous actions?
power isn't it? the ability to control someone's fate is the key. the ability to instill instant fear and obedience is the driving force behind such sick motives.
its intriguing how these antisocial personalities can evolve into highly intelligent serial killers with immaculate action plans. how they see their sadistic actions as "messiahic", deciding who should live and die. it's not so much of a mental illness, but rather character flaws that they're suffering from. loners living out of reality amidst their little "safe" world where there's no place for remorse. in fact, they're more likely to see their actions as justice awarded to the malfunctioning society (which i don't deny the world is at times fucked up).
it also made me rethink certain issues. like:
1) how far would one go to save itself from doom?
2) how far would one go to save its loved ones from fear and agony?
3)what is one more afraid of? pain (self amputation), death, being alive sans hope of survival or being alone (chained up in a room in no man's land)?
every human's claustrophobic, and claustrophobia creates fear and fear results in violence. is that why we're always at war? because earth's overly populated and the struggle for control and power's getting out of hand? its america against the terrorists now. but what if one thing led to another based on loose alliances and the yellow people get involved? would china and japan once again revive the horrors and anguish of WWII with massive collateral damage?
growing up in "taken for granted" safe hands, nestled away from crazed militia dominance, over indulging in superficial logo displays, what will we become when the day of reckoning comes?
what would we do then?
cos louis vuitton would not matter shit anymore would it?
bee wrote this at 8:48 PM
pandora's box
what meant as an innocent tv chill out to sex and the city left me a twinge of bitter aftertaste. perhaps bitter's the wrong word. poignant may be a better choice. and so i flew home at 120km/hr across the PIE and winding roads of paya lebar with glassy eyes. sped so fast till i almost scratched the sides of my dear mpv against a killer truck filled with petroleum. fucking idiot that i am. but it woke me up in that instant and the reflexes calmed to a mere 60km/hr. did i digress? yes. likewise protaganist carrie bradshaw i haven't had exactly perfect relationships to speak with in the past and i reckon i'm part of that problem. it's not that i don't open myself to talking and getting things off my chest. i do talk. but only at the right moment after analysing the complete situation. and sometimes, things may be a tad too late after all that 24 hour logical scrutiny. at times, i've always wondered why i'm always the immediate filler after THE ONE. why am i always a step late? and like carrie's fears, i don't like opening boxes. the fear of setting free crates of worms freak me out. but then again, how can i be progressive in any relationship if i'm not brave enough to look into pandora's little box of secrets? it may not be a can of worms. it may be a lovely musical box with a ballerina dancing to pachelbel? or it maybe nothing at all? what am i afraid of? the fear of losing the race? the moment of realisation that something which i've yearned for is no longer in sight. yes. that's my fear.bee wrote this at 2:15 AM
Friday, November 12, 2004
voila! penning the invites
this is damn funny (taken from "tricorn" kevin ng's dinner invites.)Remember to bring (in order of increasing verbosity)
Dry wit
Sharp retorts
Brilliant insights
Constructive arguments
Please do not bring:
Calculators
In-Laws
Yesterday's pizza
Terrorists
and yeah. i'm kinda freed up in the office as you can see with my incessant blog updates. *enjoy till the next wave of "sai" comes*
sai- hokkien for shit.
oh. thought i'll post this too. but haven't gotten to rounding the tarts up yet.
theme: The Silent Nite Crawl: DRAGS, GIGOLOS & TARTS. We want you.
Cos we think they rock. And we want you dressed up to the 9s like them, shock the shit outta others and come pub-a-crawling with us on 18 Dec. So mark that down right now. The Drag and Tart queens are planning the routes and will keep you posted. Till then. *mwwah mwwah* air kiss.
cos i dun wanna waste makeup doing the drag getups, i reckon i'm going as a "mamasan". then again, i would love to see some of my male buds be a sport and do the drag. YUM.
bee wrote this at 5:35 PM
the one that puts a curve on my lips
nothing beats waking up on christmas morning to:1. crooners singing xmas music
2. discover a new book "the e after christmas" by matt beaumont (i can't find this book anywhere, not even my dear amazon, let's hope celine who's coming back from new york finds it)
3. find my dearest sleeping [snorin] next to me
4. find a lovely new pair of nine west boots next to my bed [darn. doubt mom reads my blog]
5. look forward to a great christmas party in the evening with loved one and friends
6. watch pseudo master and mom open their presents like 5 year old kids [then again, they ALWAYS cheated and opened their pressies before 12 midnite,there was a year they couldn't wait and did the unforgivable at 11.30pm.]
7. discover pseudo master has finally tackled his little girl's love for all things bohemian and gets her something from michal negrin instead of inappropriate designs from pricey jewellers [of which i cannot bring myself to exchange for something else at the boutique lest it breaks his heart].
8. our exciting adventure to russia [and making it back in one piece. so if i stopped blogging after 10 jan, you guys will know what happenened to us].
bee wrote this at 9:27 AM
the one that melted my heart
opps. naughty naughty
even santa has his horny days. such a comforting thought *awww*. too bad i dun earn enuff to go up to lapland this christmas but i promise i will. can't wait to see you and till then, we'll keep our little secret (of kicking someone down the stairs) *hush hush*
bee wrote this at 1:00 AM
Monday, November 08, 2004
fabio
i cannot believe i'm bloggin on FABIO. yes. the iconic long haired, big chested dude that appeared on many (un)sexually titillating romance novel covers in his younger days. and i'm not mad. neither am i desperate. i'm just finding some form of distraction and destressing from the hectic planning of our impending xmas trip to helsinki and st petersburg.hell. this blog's specially dedicated to my man.[well, u asked who fabio was sometime back rite? so i've specially done some research for your benefit.]
http://www.fabioifc.com
it's no ordinary site. its a friggin INTERNATIONAL fan site. that's how huge this dude is. but he does look good for his age i must say...and who the hell can actually launch a line of women's outerwear and increase sales by 2,000%??? WHOA. i've never seen any launch that successful. perhaps it's a typo on the site. nevertheless, i reckon there're aplenty lessons and tips to be picked up from love God. then perhaps it'll put the big boys from wieden & kennedy or goodby, silverstein & partners outta business cos u ain't need kick ass creatives anymore. neither do u need to spend more than $10mil on a campaign.
you only need FABIO. *whatever* give me brad pitt anytime baby.
bee wrote this at 10:18 PM
Sunday, November 07, 2004
the adventure of mistaken identities
Friday 5 Nov 2004, 1.30pm @ mamashop, china square"wah, she looks malay huh?" indian shopkeeper to bert
"...oh?" me and bert
"yah, are you peranakan? u dun look chinese lar." indian shopkeeper
"...hmmm..."
2 sec outta the shop
"u look offended man."
"oh? not really, this non chinese thing happened many times"
"yeah?"
"yup. i was cambodian, vietnamese, hongkie, thai chinese, japanese. but tis the first time i was told i look malay."
i reckon i'm getting versatile. i should join the FBI or KGB as a spy.
Sunday 7 Nov, 11.15am @ zara takashimaya
"excuse me, do u have this in other colors?"
"...?"
HULLO.
i really dunno what's up with this auntie but hell, would anyone be as stupid as to mistake someone standing in front of the mirror checking out her potential "new outfit" as a likely salesperson? if i was wearing something similar to the zara shirt pants uniform, mayhaps i may forgive the silliness of the situation but NOOOOOO....i was in pink and green and toting a shoulder bag.
er...so do salespeople these days go round trying on clothes and carrying handbags during working hours? Where the fuck are her brains? and for a lady carrying gucci? she's not exactly as shopper savvy as i thought of then. oh well. but she wasn't nasty so i forgave her moment of dimness and directed her to the correct staff.
the next thing i need is to wait in line at the hawker centre and have someone tell me their order. i'll be terribly offended then and would not hesitate to tell you to FUCK OFF. so the next time you're thinking of approaching someone, please, just take two secs for a closer look at the surroundings before you speak. lest if you have the unfortunate luck of meeting me, i will not think twice bout pointing out "boh nau (pt.1)" at an uncomfortable conversation volume.
bugger off u "sotongs (pt.2)"
1. local lingo (hokkien) for brain deficiency/ lacking brains
2. local lingo for "blurness"
bee wrote this at 8:08 PM
Thursday, November 04, 2004
mind boggling actions
here i am sitting at my desk devouring pringles at 120km/hr whilst awaiting the client's mind boggling worries on superficial issues.too-doo-doo-doo-doo.
oh FUCK.
i just wanna go home.
i just wanna eat dinner.
i just wanna watch mind numbling tv.
i just wanna cuddle under my covers and listen to christmas carols.
i just wanna sleep.
why oh why do people nitpick on the trifling details when the bigger picture has more to offer?
bee wrote this at 7:34 PM
discoveries of the day
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Civil_Rights_Movementhttp://web.amnesty.org/actforwomen/index-eng
an excellent read and awesome reference source.
bee wrote this at 1:37 PM
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
christmas lights
starry eyed
was at ikea over the weekend and stumbled upon these lovely lights bearing great semblance to christmas wreaths...i like...boo-yew-tee-foo. xmas's the only time of the year (especially this year) that puts a smile on my face despite shit hitting me from all directions. can't wait to finally watch snow falling instead of itsy pelts and solidified snow. st petersburg and helsinki, here i come.
bee wrote this at 9:53 PM
bee-jewelled
| What kind of jewel are you? Amethyst You are the epitome of loveliness. Your friends secretly hope to learn from you what makes you so beautiful, both inside and out.
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mak, thank your lucky stars this girl ain't like jewels as much as she digs vintage and bohemian beads. *ha!*
bee wrote this at 7:30 PM
what's freedom without a choice?
http://www.cnn.com/2004/ALLPOLITICS/11/02/ballot.samesex.marriage/index.html
made me rethink certain issues. why would i vote against a constitution and watch a wife beater jailed for murder as per a loving gay couple? is it so wrong to allow two same-sexed people in love to be parents? does the definition of "core responsibility" change?
bee wrote this at 1:15 PM
dream chronicles
why oh why do i keep dreaming?- my old bedroom in jurong
To dream that you are in the bedroom, signifies aspects of your self that you keep private. It is also indicative of your sexual nature. To see your childhood home in particular, suggests your own desires for building a family. It also reflects aspects of yourself that were prominent or developed during the time you lived in that home. You may experience some feelings or unfinished expression of emotions that are now being triggered by a waking situation.
- american tourists (one female was topless)
To see people you don't know in your dream, denotes hidden aspects of yourself that you need to confront. To see tourist in your dream, signifies insecurity in love and unfinished tasks.
- me travelling (staying in my old house as a "hotel")
To dream that you are traveling, signifies the journey toward your life goals and a journey through life in general. that you enjoy what you do and find much pleasure in it.
visit http://dreammoods.com for some reader friendly decoding of dreams and best of all, it ain't try to sell you some tarot BS (i like tarot readings but selective ones).
bee wrote this at 8:47 AM
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
the awww moments
mak and niece laura
bee wrote this at 11:08 PM
Golden fingers
icky!
have you ever hopped onto a cab, stuck your fingers happily into the little indented door handle and discover to your horror soggy tissue stuffed inside?unassuming regular cabbers like me have had the "golden" opportunity for the third time (in less than six months) of dipping her fingers into God-knows-what-its-been-used-for hidden tissues. i brought the inconsiderate action to the attention of the cabby. the poor guy told me he had worse. some prickheads would stuff food packages (think old changkee oily paper bags) into the pockets behind the driver's and leave half filled coke cans on the passenger seats. its truly amazing the idiocy and selfishness of some peabrained individuals.
an exploratory session: origination of soggy tissues
mucus?
nah.
could be something else...
sweat soaked ones due to heat?
an honest episode of rain resulting in a wipe down?
spilled water in cab?
nah.
gunk?
more undefined watery substance from the nostrils?
fucking more MUCUS?
ARGH.
oh jeez.
why oh why do singaporeans always pick their noses in the car?
HULLO. you may be inside but i can so fucking see you lor.
and to think i had to endure and sit in the cab for another fifteen minutes before i could get my hands on water and dettol. bless little ole singapore for her abundance of washrooms and dustbins.
bee wrote this at 10:40 PM
the one with the spots
the red spot of pus.the bumpy tiny boil.
the future of a potholed face.
the pimple.
the bane of every teenager.
i used to suffer anxiety attacks over my skin conditions then. where each pimple would diminish my chances of being picked up by a cute high school jock at some coffee joint. ha! i'm four years away to the grand old thirty shelf and here i am still fretting bout the occasional spot.
had an interesting conversation on extreme skin conditions with a houseman friend over the weekend. she would've laughed her head off at my daft worries over a couple of little red spots. which really ain't nothing compared to the severe conditions seen in her dermatology reference book. looking at the grosteque pictures, one can't help feeling sorry for these unfortunate individuals who probably are forced to live in isolation to avoid people like us gawking. trust me, some of the conditions are so bad you can't bring yourself to look much less see in person. i felt like a total phony. perhaps i'm the pathetic one cos i don't possess their courage to face the world if put in a similar circumstance.
the superficial coward that i am.
i bow my head in shame.
bee wrote this at 8:43 AM
