welcome to her world

the one with thirty days

so its finally confirmed. just got notice from big boss about the severance package me and a few other colleagues will be getting tomorrow due to current "restructuring". now all we have to do is to hang round for thirty days for this package to fall onto our laps. the rest who will not be getting the notice tomorrow would have to work for an extended period till committed campaigns are completed before getting their packages. so i should be thankful i'm getting mine tomorrow instead of fighting it out in a dreary and demoralising environment alone the next couple of months.

yuppie gripe: will have to live without spinellis and fancy food places for the time being.

bee wrote this at 2:40 PM

the one with the amazing race

did i ever mention what a BIG fan i am of CBS's the amazing race?

anyhow, rushed home from dinner last evening to catch the first episode of the family edition and i so wanted to slap the paolos right down from the mom to the boys. i have to say i'm very impressed by carissa from the gaghan family, amazing team spirit and enthusiasm for a nine year old i must say, and cute as a button to boot! but we'll see how the kids go as they move along the race, not an easy feat cos some tasks are just more advantageous with four adults than two (manual labour like canoeing). then again, it really depends on how strategic you are in making use of what you have. the gaghans made a smart choice in the buggy cos the kids are like feathers in comparison to 400 pounds of deadweight. what were the aiellos' and linzs' thinking?

conversation with the other half during amazing race's commercial break:
m: hullo, what are you doing now?
b: hi sweets, me watching amazing race
m: so you don't wanna talk to me? but i want to talk to you for ten minutes, no half an hour!
b: cannot, i wanna watch tv!!!!!
m: kidding la, i'm watching it too (amazing race music comes on) ok ok, program's back, bye!
b: bye!

bee wrote this at 11:17 AM

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

quote of the morning

Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.
Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

bee wrote this at 9:00 AM

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

the one with the pizza cloud

two hungry souls took eons to decide on dinner last evening. it was a toss between pizza hut, california pizza or KFC. but how the heck are they to finish 2 regular sized california pizzas by themselves unless the fridge had sufficient space for leftovers? why can't they do thin crusted personal sized pizzas like the marche ones? the other half left the final choice to her and she decided to walk back to the kopitiam for a healthier alternative like beehoon or meepok.

but...she saw pizza in his eyes...

b: sweetie, look at me
m: continues fiddling and staring forlornly at california pizza brochure
b: sweetie, i said look me in the eye and tell me you want pizza and we'll go back to get it ok? cos i really don't mind having it if you are ok with finishing the leftovers tomorrow?
m: puppy eyes that scream PIZZA but said "no no its ok, let's have meepok, come come" puts arm around her shoulder as they ambled back to the kopitiam.

how cute...it's the little things about them that make you laugh.

btw, the ban mien which they both had in the end was totally unsatisfying. it's pizza anytime the next round sweetie, my fault. bleah.

listening to tim tamashiro's be my life companion

bee wrote this at 9:29 AM

Monday, September 26, 2005

the one with the WHO ARE YOU? meme

i'm that little girl who used to be heartbroken when you chucked her hand drawn birthday cards aside.

i'm the jealous one who hated primary school and all the rich moms and brats with maids in tow and big houses to return to after school.

i'm the underachiever kid in primary school who failed terribly at mathematics amongst a class of math geeks.

i'm the girl every lian wanted to beat up cos i wasn't friendly enough.

i'm the one bengs protected cos they liked my face.

i'm the loner girl who hated school project work cos my brain works better alone.

i'm the agnostic who started questioning the big guy up there and who, where and what is it about him that i should worship him for? i'm only just beginning to understand his work and am still learning.

i'm the half quitter woman who gave up my dreams cos i didn't want them enough to work harder towards it.

i'm the foolish woman who went for players and pseudo relationships the past three years cos i was afraid of being in love yet unconsciously seeking it.

i'm the hard judgmental bitch who thinks you should be responsible for your philandering ways and not get pissed with the world when the truth gets out.

i'm the unfilial daughter for talking back at you all the time cos it annoys me when you refuse to admit your simple mistake.

i'm the supportive girlfriend who's not afraid to be your friend but doesn't know how to control the emotional mind.

i'm the loyal friend who is always there in spirit cos good friends are hard to come by and those whom i have now are gems which i treasure and fend for. then again, some friends change over the years and i no longer know how to reach out to you anymore when you keep making the same mistakes.

i'm the daughter who feels guilty when i lose my patience and yell at you for not understanding the changing world and beat myself up for it later cos i know it's really not your fault in the first place.

i'm the "optimistic" girl cos no one wants to be around negativity. the last thing anyone need is to be at the receiving end of anger so i try hard to be pleasant at all times even though i'm bleeding inside out. the optimism started as a common courtesy and ended up being part of my personality that set me apart.

i'm the jaded woman who thinks marriage is mostly a legality for future alimony cases. nothing is forever they say, live for the moment but i would still break down the day i watch my (ex) husband walk past me like a total stranger.

i'm the insecure woman in the kitchen wishing i was born with domesticated flair. do you not know how scared i am each time of looking like a fool as i stumble over cooking devices, chop vegetables at snail's pace, skin tomatoes the wrong way, never baked a cake from scratch (always better crocker). but this will change when i move into my new family home end of this year.

i'm the soft hearted girl who yearns to adopt children from third world countries and be able to give love and care for someone who's robbed of such simply joys through war, famine and unfortunate circumstances.

i'm the devil for wanting the world at her feet.

Who are you?

bee wrote this at 1:50 PM

8peekaboos

seven meme

tagged by terse for being a lurker *snigger*

7 things that scare me:
1. being jobless
2. kidnapped by psycho and buried alive in a coffin six feet under
3. being paralysed or bed ridden
4. losing my loved ones
5. being the last living person on earth
6. stupid zombie horror films
7. war

7 things I like most:
1. snuggled under covers when its pouring outside
2. discovering good finds in a second hand book/ vintage store
3. morning coffees alone with a good book
4. walking in the rain
5. being in a relationship
6. pedicures
7. head massages

7 important things in my room:
1. cellphone
2. passport
3. tank
4. wallet (with cards and cash)
5. cds (yes, i'm old school, not a laggard and no money to splurge on MP3)
6. diaries
7. bolster

7 random facts about me:
1. don't like furry anything (hence pets should be short haired)
2. loves scriptwriting and painting
3. quit piano before first grading cos the teacher had an annoying knack of comparing students.
4. neurotic bordering on OCD complex, i need to do certain things a certain number of times or i'll feel uneasy for the day
5. i can converse in mumble jumble japanese
6. obsessive love for broccoli and corn, i can consume two broccoli flowers and 1kg of corn at one sitting
7. had 5 ear piercings up my right ear but removed them after allergies and infections

7 things I plan to do before I die:
1. backpack around japan
2. get married
3. have kids (or adopt)
4. spend a weekend at delomore lodge on waiheke island, new zealand
5. cook an entire meal from scratch for close ones
6. write a letter to MOE telling them to stop being hypocritical with its constant harp on developing creative thinking when current stressful and confusing streaming structures (at such a young age like primary two/three) are still in place
7. tell my family and close ones how much i love them

7 things I can do:
1. be really really nice when i'm nasty
2. pick at my fingers till its bloody and not feel a thing at all
3. multitask by IMing three people, talking on the cell and typing an email at the same time
4. talk my way out
5. speed walk from city hall to wheelock place
6. shoulder stand
7. eat bread 7 days in a row

7 things I can’t do:
1. parallel park
2. swim
3. cycle
4. headstand
5. sms without looking at keypad
6. run in three inch heels anymore
7. bungee jump or skydive or steep roller coasters (me suspect an eye vessel might burst and i'll have blood shot eyes for more than a month)

7 things I say the most:
1. many varieties of fuck
2. ...and stuff like that
3. duh!
4. really?
5. sorry
6. OMG
7. whatever

7 celebrity crushes:
1. brad pitt (hello, he's on the fucking encyclopedia list ok, what else can i say?)
2. yutaka takenouchi
3. john malkovich
4. gary oldman
5. maggie cheung (how can anyone age so beautifully?)
6. oshio manabu (american japanese)
7. abe hiroshi

and yeah, i do have a thing for the japanese.

not tagging anyone cos i'm obviously more free than anyone on my list now.

bee wrote this at 11:32 AM

the idiocy of certain homosapiens

wasted half her morning waiting for the electricity to come back on. stubborn landlord just can't seem to get his act together. wouldn't it save him a ton in the long run if he spent a little more fixing up proper mains like electrical wiring, plumbing and aircon rather than spending it on three to five miscellaneous servicing trips per month.

fucking ludicrous.

bee wrote this at 10:38 AM

Friday, September 23, 2005

quote of the day

"if you can do tech accounts, you can do any account."
interviewer

bee wrote this at 3:58 PM

house hunt- dreamy townhouse special

toohey street footscray for $330k
lincoln mews kensington for $380k
laity street richmond for $365k (the interiors are gorgeous despite its prison like grim outlook)
graham street port melbourne for $400k (far but the roof garden's sweet)
jasmine street caulfield south for $640k (ok, i can see myself renting this to asian students at monash's caulfield campus)
porter street prahran for $500k
cheltenham for $360k (looks interesting but have a bad feeling its far off)

when you wish upon a star...

bee wrote this at 2:50 PM

Thursday, September 22, 2005

adorable baby girl

if i had a baby like cleo (dom's niece), i'll be blogging bout her day and night, taking her out to the shops and for coffees... what an absolute sweetheart!

bee wrote this at 4:20 PM

men...are quite funny.

beep beep.

sms from dom

dom: eh, where's tony working now?
bee: batey. why? so long never hear from you
dom: hahaha ya i also say. i thought i saw someone like him here
bee: what are you doing at batey??
dom: fixing pool table
bee: ....ya that's him. but wait, i thought batey not doing so well (thinks: got money for pool table meh?)

ms bee IMs tony

l bee: tonsils in the rain l says:
eh, dom's at your agency fixing a pool table
Let's just say anything says:
really haha! i saw a half-fixed pool table
Let's just say anything says:
i go check him out
l bee: tonsils in the rain l says:
he smsed me to ask where you are just to make sure he didn't see wrongly ...funny la you two
Let's just say anything says:
haha he put on weight
l bee: tonsils in the rain l says:
ya! opps, he's gonna skin me now
Let's just say anything says:
he's fixing the stuff now...
Let's just say anything says:
going for a smoke later

bee wrote this at 2:26 PM

the one with an amazing endless pit

a glutton she was with the cravings she had so far.

breakfast: wholemeal croissant and hot chocolate
lunch: mee hoon yong tau hoo dry with fishballs, tofu and taupok PLUS $3 worth of veggies from economic rice store and pu er tea [and yes she finished both meals]
next up...
tea: mixed berry yoghurt in the fridge for potential snack later.
dinner: porridge dinner with jules and mei

there's something wrong with me today.

and no, i'm not pregnant and it's not funny.

bee wrote this at 1:42 PM

the one with the WhIP

after suffering a couple of weeks as the client struggled to get its new team on board, the ever long WIP yesterday turned out to be some dragon slaying session for one of our teammates. anyhow, it dragged on till mid day cos the client needed to break for an urgent regional conference call.

it was funny how the "urgent" conference call came about.

first the big boss surprised me and other suit when he told the client we're not submitting any plans that go beyond september cos that's when the retainer ends. no renewal no more work, period. clients were obviously shocked and resorted to their usual arm twisting "you must give me ammunition to prove you deserve the renewed retainer" bull. big boss then threw this power line "we've proven ourselves the past three years and i don't think we need to do that anymore thank you very much" and sat back smirking.

WOO HOO!!!

can you imagine any agency telling its client to FO? this is probably the first time in our lives as a suit where we prayed the client would fire us and save us the hassle of dragging our asses through the day as we await THE NEWS from our new management (which is long overdue). at this point in time, we can see the fingers of a certain client flying furiously across her laptop's keypad and we suspected she was on IM with her boss in regards to this unnaturally laid back attitude of her agency. hence the urgent concall.

how amusing. i'm beginning to like this shift of dynamics already.

bee wrote this at 11:18 AM

black bee down

she's going to be really sick soon, gonna run over to OCBC centre to see the doc later. the tonsils are inflamed with the constant frog- in- the- throat syndrome, nose is getting runny, body feels lethargic. crap, its really getting to her.

and there's an evening interview tonight so she's got to hang in there. anyhow there's a fucking long contact report to finish up after the disgusting six hour WIP yesterday(which she will blog bout later), plus a need to sort out cab claims by this week.

*chews sweater*

bee wrote this at 8:51 AM

6peekaboos

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

bin nights

bins at student v murdoch, originally uploaded by bee s.

OMG how nostalgic is this? the bin shift we call it. murdoch's student campus is segregated by individual blocks or flats and each regular flat accomodates six, kind of like an apartment except your flatmates change every quarter due to the american exchange students. it was helluva fun though i really hated:
- lazy selfish morons who leave week old unwashed pots in the sink
- flatmates who slam doors
- drunken mates who knock on your door at two am asking if you've seen his bottle of vodka
- female flatties who don't clear their hairball mess in the bath.
- overflowing bins in the kitchen and everyone just keeps squeezing and topping it up
- flatties who just...smell...REAL bad in the mornings (sorry i know you can't help it)

and adored flatmates:
- who bake, i love you ryan for your peanut butter fudge!
- who are clean freaks
- who eat steak at three am in the morning
- who wake up past twelve noon and i've the entire flat to myself
- who like arthouse cinema and vegetate to sbs together
- who like driving people around

aah. the simple joys of campus life. and thank you celine for this exclusive picture and for helping me with the bin when it got too heavy.

bee wrote this at 4:15 PM

4peekaboos

remembering perth

remembering perth, originally uploaded by bee s.

compliments of celine who just returned from perth. kakulas sister was our favourite grocery place for wholesale pasta, japanese crackers, imported canned tuna, cooking ingredients, organic dabblings. i miss freo so very very very much.

*big sniff*

bee wrote this at 12:01 PM

what do you like about singapore?

poverty renders many desperate actions and my heart goes out to the little girl and her parents. don't we just take our safe environment for granted?

someone asked me during an interview last evening what i liked most about singapore. the first thing that came to mind was the food, followed by safety and its cosmopolitan city life. i've been so used to mixing with friends of other races it never occured to me people could still be such racist bigots. i'll put it aside as narrow mindedness and probably those who've never seen much of the world outside.

as a matter of fact, i've witnessed more badassed behavoir from more singaporean chinese than any others, sad and embarassing altogether cos i'm chinese too (egads). i've personally witnessed the growing impatience and lack of basic courtesy amongst singaporean chinese who simply have no respect for others and are concerned only about themselves.

and yeah i figured i'm no mohammed, i can't make the mountains move, so i decided to move away instead. the quitter taking an easy way out you say? i don't think so. i'm giving up first class citizenship to be a second class race in another place, it'll not be an easy feat but i'm willing to give it a shot cos surviving out of the comfort zone makes living a little bit more colorful and gratifying.

bee wrote this at 9:36 AM

girls' night out

the ladies at FES's teh tarik place, originally uploaded by bee s.

pictures from thursday's night out is up on flickr, that's me, jules, mei and jaime here. took so long cos it came from three different cameras, this particular one came from mei's sony ericsson 750i. not bad for a phone at all. camera phone inventions sure do turn ladies into shameless photobugs *hahaha*

bee wrote this at 9:12 AM

6peekaboos

Monday, September 19, 2005

when people go out of line

nothing pisses me off more than to realise a colleague bitching bout me when i was away on sick leave last friday. apparently i didn't make it clear to her it was an "mc" and she assumed i took a day off just because it pleased me. then she bitched about doing me not helping her with her work and that i had the cheek to ask her for updates if the agency's supposed management meeting is still on. what's so difficult about that? considering she's always asked me to let the receptionist know when she's on bloody medical leave. just cos you had a bad day (again) doesn't mean everyone in the agency has to take your shit (again as usual).

if you're in dire need of help, open your mouth and ask. what's wrong with asking for help? we all do that because we've never succumbed to the idiotic level of assuming people having ESP. and yes, we're suppose to cover each other by answering calls when one is out of the office but that's about it as far as our job scopes and responsibilities go. we're more than glad to help out as a team but with your rude and selfish attitudes where you bark at anyone for no good reason, it's pretty obvious why four pairs of free hands are not helping you out here.

bee wrote this at 10:31 AM

lazy gourmet deli

lazy gourmet deli, originally uploaded by bee s.

found this awesome place compliments of trish. its called lazy gourmet deli at shaw centre, scotts road. it's mad during lunch hours cos of the small seating space and large expat crowd so if you prefer some private and quaint (jazzy) deli in the city, dinner's definitely the way to go. we had egg benedict, salmon and scrambled egg sandwiches and finished off with an apple pie and hot tea for just under 35 bucks. great way of rounding up a friday night after thur's alcohol binge though it took alot of self will for a dessert junkie to leave the profiteroles and mudcakes alone.

bee wrote this at 9:26 AM

the one where she smiled

roses, originally uploaded by bee s.

sometimes it doesn't take alot to make a woe-man smile.

thank you, saturday night was really special (to me).

bee wrote this at 9:23 AM

Friday, September 16, 2005

home sick

maybe one of these days i'll probably end up with an ulcer in the gastric or something. ack. better look into my insurance again, if i do contract some shit, better ensure i can afford to look after myself then..bleah.

in the span of just four hours last night, the table was filled with appletinis, lycheetinis, hazelnutinis, saketinis (yuck its like cucumber juice) and four heavy hearted women. in the midst of getting drowned in a girl's best friend martini, she received an sms from an old uni mate who recently broke up with her boyfriend of five years cos she found out he was cheating on her. that's horrible to hear at this point in time, i've always thought of them as the finest couple and he was what we described as one of the "sweetest" man we've ever seen, someone whom we've constantly praised and envied about. They had plans to get hitched and were even joking bout moving into her huge family home. heartbreaking indeed. not sure if she's able to survive this cos five years is a long time. as strong as she is, women are women, we often over romanticise and hang onto things which we're supposed to let go off but we can't. we can't do things men do and we'll always beat ourselves over it by crying. it's definitely a bad aura going round, and perhaps we are just like what a male friend had described over MSN yesterday morning, we should be called woe-men. how apt.

haha. *hic*

on a happier note, i found a potential new phone! mei was showing me her sony ericsson 750i, easy to navigate, keypads' solid (unlike motorola's razor) and the camera's not bad for a phone. its not the latest model but hell, functionality beats every other thing. so yah me! probably go down to the stores this or next weekend alone cos the other half's too busy, boring place for girlfriends and i hate going to these places with the father cos he'll have 101 personal opinions on anything. just hope i don't end up making the wrong decision like the ibook which i overpaid *pulls hair*.

bee wrote this at 9:32 AM

Thursday, September 15, 2005

quote of the day 2

love is born of faith, lives on hope and dies of charity
unknown

whoa... deep and depressing but true in many ways.

bee wrote this at 6:14 PM

house hunt

OMG. a townhouse that i can finally afford at this point in time no shit. though i'm not sure if brunswick west is a tad dodgy, gotta remember to ask jules later...

bee wrote this at 4:53 PM

that thang called L-KOHL-HALL

meeting the girls (jules, jaime and mei) for a media gig later. it's nuyou's all italian affair at the pavillion, not sure if there're italian studs around but hell, any party with free booze is a good party no? they say alcohol's a bad way of alleviating pain but sigh, sometimes people do get desperate and resort to short term methods. but i've gotta remember to be level-headed and slow down cos i haven't been out getting pissed with the girls for a long while. woo hoo! when unsober, always remember to keep a tight watch on your valuables and ask the bar for a plastic bag before you hop onto the cab. responsible passengers we must be cos i'm a driver too and fucking stupid stunts like merlionising (puking) all over the car seats and interiors's simply unforgivable.

let's see, one moderate alcoholic, one reformed alcoholic and two full time alcoholics out for a night of free booze. eh so who's on mc tomorrow for hangover? LOL

ps: looking forward to catching up with mei (my ex client haha) and jaime whom i've never met before despite reading bout her life.

bee wrote this at 4:06 PM

quote of the day

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.~ 1 Cor 10:13

i try... to believe.

bee wrote this at 12:22 PM

inflation

haven't been smoking for a while and i just realised the price of superslims went up by thirty cents to $10.50 now.

good grief. i dread the day it goes up to $20 a pack. ouch.

bee wrote this at 10:26 AM

the broken

at times it doesn't take alot to break a person when she's feeling an all new low.
then again, she could've been stronger herself like what she's been before.
she's trying. very very hard.
it's not easy doing it alone but she'll make it.
she always does.
it just makes her a lot more cynical and harsher when she comes out of it.
stand strong girl, you didn't make it here for nothing.
and like a girlfriend's byline, "be good to yourself".

sort it out.

listening to bic runga's sway

bee wrote this at 8:58 AM

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

growing old together

the interesting lunch with ex boss yesterday was inspiring. married with three kids, juggling family, career and finances, how do you keep the relationship going? where do you find the time for it?

his answer was simple.

no matter how busy husband and wife were, they always made it a point to keep at least a day a week for that alone time. its nothing much, perhaps even ridiculous to some sticky female species. but i like that thought. in this day and age, it's so easy to just lose yourself in the "now", in everything around you. work dilemmas, mindless leisure, money worries, political struggles, family crisis, troubled friends, ugly tragedies and what nots. at the end of the day, these relentless dramas are never ending. do you race with it till you're 60?

the point of having someone in your life is to help pull you back into form so that you don't lose yourself. but should you prefer to immerse yourself in the mind numbling world, who do you eventually reach out to when it all ends?

or would you choose to embark on the brave single journey? one where you smile and laugh and say this is the best moment of your life when you are 60, sipping the finest red in your expensive city penthouse with no one by your side to share this success with? i watched my aunt worked her ass off for the past 30 years, never taking a break, never hanging loose with friends, never having a relationship, cos she didn't have the time and energy to deal with it (she works past 2am everyday, even on weekends). and i watched her lose it all to ill health and death. she was barely past 45 years of age.

living means something more to me.

bee wrote this at 1:16 PM

in the name of trance

the best of trance '98 cd she picked them 7 years ago still amazes her. euphoric yes, but trance is where she finds deep solace, a place where she can shut herself and lock certain painful moments up. in particular billie ray martin's honey (chicane club mix by tiesto, scroll down under song titles for a sampler) and gouryella's walhalla.

thank god for trance, and tiesto.

bee wrote this at 9:08 AM

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

the one where she felt a tad nostalgic

had lunch with ex boss today and she had to admit she missed the old team at the agency very much. how many times in your life do you find the right chemistry with the entire agency ( minus four dinosaurs and one short man)?

bee wrote this at 4:51 PM

1peekaboos

Sunday, September 11, 2005

when the children speak

When a terrorist’s hand grenade was hit by a bullet, he blew up and his brains hit me. It was all fatty and slippery.

i don’t believe in god. i believe in russia.

we had to drink pee, everyone was doing it cos we had no water.

i was hoping that harry potter would come. i remembered he had a cloak that made him invisible and he would come wrap me in it and we’ll escape.

we knew they would kill us, the only thing i wanted to see was my mum and then die.

we were thrown into a pile of bodies. it was hard to breathe and there were children beneath us.

i saw my mom and she was lying like this. he (terrorist) wouldn’t let me go back to her. [at some point, this boy's voice broke]

someone’s leg blew off. someone else’s head blew off. i was so frightened i ran away.

my mother taught me to survive in many ways. now she is dead. i missed her a lot and i still miss her because i know she’s never coming back.

in the past before the attack on my school, i used to play the terrorists (video game) because they had better weapons, now i prefer to play the cops. although their weapons aren’t so good, i simply like to kill terrorists now. when i dream, i dreamt about the gym and that i would turn into the iron man and kill all the terrorists. i thought that god was giving me another chance, so now i have changed and have become a good boy.

a footballer came to the hospital. they gave us 15,000 roubles. if an adult lost a child, they gave 20,000 roubles. i don’t understand how they can measure lives with money.

i used to be happy. but things have changed here. if I die, I die, I don’t care anymore.

and I said God please save us but he didn’t. He saved the ones that he could. He kept the best. The most beautiful ones died, the best children.

above were conversation snippets with children who survived the tragic three day school hostage crisis in beslan, southern russia in september 2004 (covered by BBC’s documentary) which ended in 331 deaths with half the dead being children.

bee wrote this at 11:51 PM

6peekaboos

the one with a grim fairy tale

In the beginning, there was a fairy tale.

As an only child, I lived by my own stories. I laugh, I cry, I mimic. Colouring books and cut out dolls were my perfect companions. For the pre school years, I was terrified of the bogeyman under my bed, clowns at parties and people standing too close for comfort. When I was twelve, I was enthralled by Sidney Sheldon’s politics and mysteries, wondering if I would ever be like the heroine, leading the country, saving the world and escaping punishments from perverted establishments. I wanted to be a phenomenal being. I was such a dreamer because I’ve no idea what life has in store for me.

Many of these childish myths dissolved as I have come to witness lately:
- presidential walkovers three years in a row for the lack of potential candidates
- Singapore’s education system actually admired by the west
- The so called freedom of speech that is subject to approval, an oxymoron indeed
- not for profit charities and religious leaders under fire for money laundering
- government officials lax on preventive epidemic measures despite global warnings
- a good life’s defined by material gains and no longer intrinsic goals.
- tom, dick and harry plays golf
- unattended bags would either blow up in your face or exacerbate a heart attack when you discover grisly body parts
- frustrating situations where flood devastation victims are shouting for help and international aid’s delayed (denied) by the country’s leaders.

Such mind boggling truths.

But I’ll to still think of myself as a phenomenal being, alongside a million others as they wake up each day with mental checklists and go to bed with thoughts of more checklists and wondering where the day’s gone.

A grim fairy tale life turned out to be.

bee wrote this at 11:41 PM

1peekaboos

Friday, September 09, 2005

absolut metropolis

takes a while to load but if you're into music, film, japanese subcultures and trends, this is the coolest thing to check out.

bee wrote this at 3:17 PM

the one with a certain headhunter

headhunter:
(n) a recruiter of personnel (especially for corporations)
or
a savage who cuts off and preserves the heads of enemies as trophies.

anyhow, this is a trivial post about her experience with a certain headhunter somewhere in the central part of singapore near city hall.

most unfortunately,she read this article on headhunters a wee bit late:
A quick word on headhunters: some are very effective, but be careful. By definition, headhunters are more concerned with making money from placing you than they are worried about your long-term career goals. Proceed with caution. Never give a headhunter your resume without finding out exactly how it is to be used. Also, make sure that the headhunter understands your goals and needs, and only calls you when they have a position that might be a good fit (taken from www.jobcircle.com)

how apt.

she was too trusting and assumed what was good for her colleague should be good for her too. and so she sent her cv to this particular lady X without checking on her background, an action which she immediately regretted after getting off the phone with her. not only did lady X not reply her emails but she could definitely do with some brushing up of PR skills over the phone. she's never in her life come across a headhunter who told her to "chill" (in her words "i just got back to the office, give me some time no?) after she enquired if lady X received her resume which was sent out 4 days ago. hmm, so you must be VERY busy canvassing and representing your current candidates no? lady x then "advised" her to seek her own contacts should she want to consider moving over to the client's side. finding this particular headhunting firm thoroughly disappointing despite its second chance, she found herself bitching about this to a good friend who later divulged about lady X's not- too- good reputation in the industry. once again, she's a wee bit late.

ah well, lesson learnt.

good headhunters are rare as a gem. she's seen these gems at work, they are sincere, hardworking and enthusiastic in helping you find the perfect fit. and honestly we jobseekers would appreciate knowing you've tried your best even if nothing successful turns out. we're in a high turnover industry, we know what its like where CEOs and GADs change their minds about hiring and firing but please do understand we also know where we stand. imagine the wedding mafia scenario (taken from ivan misner's sales and marketing):
a florist, a photographer, a travel agent and a jeweler. they may not be in the same industries but a referral for one of them becomes a referral for all.

sad thing is, people never really do remember your achievements, it's human nature to remember bad publicity and with this tight knit industry where we need you as much as you need us, you should never ever underestimate the power of negative word-of-mouth.

so if you need a gem, try the one at capital square instead.

bee wrote this at 1:52 PM

quote of the day

people forget what you said,
people forget what you did,
but people will never forget how you made them feel.
it's the simple things in life that makes you different.

bee wrote this at 9:04 AM

The Bar at Buena Vista

her favourite cuban music's back in town and this time, its The Bar at Buena Vista, led by Maracaibo. Omara Portundo was in town a few years back and she rocked the stadium. these guys are on from Sep 14-21 at victoria theatre, 9 empress place, $35-$95.

anyone interested to immerse themselves in cuban music together?

bee wrote this at 8:47 AM

4peekaboos

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

doing the do

the resignation has been typed.
the white envelope ready.
all she needs right now is some advice from her trusted mentor if she should go ahead and submit the letter instead of hanging round till the end of next week knowing its going to be bad news anyway.
she's torn right now.
then again, whatever management decision may be, she's got to leave anyway so honestly, would it make any difference if she tendered tomorrow, friday or next week?

bee wrote this at 11:01 PM

5peekaboos

home sick

went into the office today with a shit ass case of gastric flu and headache. sorted out the event for tomorrow and headed back home round 1030. hadn't been in such pain since a long while. hell, can't be work cos its almost non existent now. mayhaps the stress of wanting the security of another job that's giving her this numbing headache. cab ride was nauseous thank god she's mastered controlled breathing techniques. can't remember if there's food at home. called mom and apparently she's out with grandma at chinatown. hell. bought a pack of nasi lemak downstairs and stuffed it down (reluctantly), took actal and panadol (would she die from eating them both together? guess not since she's blogging this now. took a nap to rid the needles in her head. ignored a call and sms cos it sounded a tad selfish and honestly wasn't a priority on her agenda at this point.

gotta remember to get the interviewer's email from abi...thank you note...will do that later...off to bed again.

bee wrote this at 2:34 PM

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

food gripes

what's so difficult bout following simple CLEAR instructions like no dressing on salads sandwiches and what nots? what's the bloody point of taking these requests down and not bothering to action them out? if you cannot NOT spread disgusting mayo on my stuff, let me know and i'll order something else which wouldn't hurt your brain cells. like a pasta or muffin. she's pissed cos you're in the service industry. you're supposed to be more attentive to the tiniest client's needs more so than others.

she hates wasabi, mayo, mustard spreads.
ex japanese tutor hated black chicken soup.
ex american housemate hated anything un-american.
girlfriend's ex australian housemate hated pork floss.
ex australian boss hates durians.
little laura hates too sweet stuff.
chinese father hates cheese.
girlfriend hates peas.
other girlfriend hates pasta.
other half hates sour anything.

oh, and she firmly believes olives should stay in martinis.

bee wrote this at 2:24 PM

rule of thumb part one

if you wanted to take a certain project away from someone,
make sure you fucking follow up and not throw the knick knacks back at the someone.

nb.

bee wrote this at 11:10 AM

the one with the birthday boy's fro

pictures from VDB's surprise bday bash last saturday are up, come see the afros with the new found carpet souvenir from tokyo.

ms bee was not seen anywhere near it cos she's freaked out by anything resembling some creepy crawlies' haven. sides, don't you ever wonder where all that black wiry textured hair came from and god knows what's hiding inside that jungle- like thing?

conversation with yumei when she first saw the fro:
y: "did he buy that from his trip?" (with incredulous look)
b: "yup" (with resigned nod)
y: "of all the things to buy in tokyo and he bought that?"
b: "uh huh"

thank goodness that was the only weird thing he bought but ms bee reckons the psp made up for it hahaha. oh, plus the lana cake too, the link's taken from a hong kong foodie who's also a big fan of lana's. as yum as it was, she kinda preferred dense chocolate cakes still and nothing, absolutely nothing beats the boston mudcake from the cheesecake shop in perth which incidently gave her six kilos worth of added weight within four months.

ha.

bee wrote this at 8:57 AM

Monday, September 05, 2005

womad 2005

womad 2005, originally uploaded by bee s.

bee wrote this at 4:03 PM

remembering bali

us in ubud, originally uploaded by bee s.

was doing a clean up of pics at flickr this morning and came across our bali pics again. this one was taken at a cafe in ubud.

here's a hug to the other half.

bee wrote this at 3:26 PM

blisterflage

what appeared to a mozzie bite on the ball of her right foot turned out to be some unidentified corn cum blister. the father spotted her eyeing and poking the suppose-ed blister and tried pulling his pseudo master stunt again. this time, pseudo pedicurist suggested his daughter allow him to burst the blister with a needle, like now.

cos if one leaves a blister alone, it'll manifest and turn even bigger and eventually, one ends up with a bigger scar.

can she please fling a bunch of bananas in his face now?

bee wrote this at 2:25 PM

1peekaboos

blubber

laissez faire.

that's the general atmosphere in the office now. we do what we have to do but nothing more and at times, something less. the latter not cos we're inefficient but simply cos we have no means of doing certain things anymore. when will this dark cloud that have hovered and settled over us start to pour? according to the little bird's weather report, the rain will come in two weeks. well, the brollies are ready. rain or shine, this little one is up and running.

ganbaranakereba naranai.

bee wrote this at 9:13 AM

Friday, September 02, 2005

globe trekking in uk

just discovered a new link to unique home stays. she's always wanted to spend a weekend at some converted breadmill or lighthouse. awesome!

bee wrote this at 11:39 AM